just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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