Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
