Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
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