That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
