I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
