scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
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