Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
