i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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