you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
He kissed a someone with a penis
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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