She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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