If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
my being single is dangerous.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
