i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
