We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Text me some of your sweat
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
