before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
