i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
