her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
