Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
