Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
