Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
