i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Randomize
