I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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