theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize