Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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