I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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