He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
