There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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