Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
