And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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