Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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