Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Dignity is for republicans.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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