I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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