i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
