Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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