cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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