i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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