3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize