Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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