I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
