Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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