U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
