i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
