I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
