So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I still have a little drunk in my system
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
