Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
