My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
