The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize