the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
