I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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