What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
where am i from again
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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