Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
